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[00:30.93]It’s hard to be living
[00:32.15]You gotta play the cards you were given
[00:33.79]You think it’s simple but it goddamn isn’t
[00:35.45]It’s tougher now than breaking out of Shawshank prison
[00:37.79]And as you’re hittin your prime
[00:39.10]People say you been committing a crime
[00:40.86]But I won’t quit till I’m home
[00:42.48]I’ll chip the limestone a bit at a time
[00:44.03]Wait! I’m a pale ass pale middle-class straight white male
[00:47.71]I won’t have an alibi the day I fail
[00:48.97]Cause if I ever went to jail, Mom would pay my bail
[00:51.26]In a heartbeat
[00:53.46]Mom and Dad have given me a lot more than a pat on the back
[00:55.39]And I gotta thank ‘em for loving me
[00:56.43]From the moment I was strapped in a Volvo car seat
[00:59.01]When I needed a pep talk
[01:00.23]I couldn’t remember to wreck shop
[01:02.06]Writer’s block, staring at my laptop desktop
[01:03.87]Or sleeping in my rental in a turnpike rest stop
[01:05.76]**** in storage, living from a suitcase
[01:07.39]Thinking “this is how a silver spoon tastes?”
[01:09.60]Cause you can make a dream possible
[01:10.76]But it’ll never be easy, no matter what you chase
[01:12.86]If you wanna poke fun then do so
[01:14.33]I’ll do it for you, it’s no crime
[01:16.04]I’m like if the dude from Juno grew a Jewfro and liked to rhyme
[01:19.78]So tell me that I’m not a rapper
[01:21.50]Tell Rudolph he can’t pull sleighs
[01:23.31]Tell pluto it’s not a planet
[01:24.67]And he’ll probably keep spinning in the same old way
[01:26.84]On and on, every day
[01:28.46]Right around the sun, wanna feel the rays
[01:30.09]You do it ‘cause you love it like nothing else in the universe
[01:32.03]And **** it, it’s embedded in your DNA
[02:32.79]