Suffocating-Dax

[00:00.000] 作词 : Daniel Nwosu Jr [00:01.000] 作曲 : Daniel Nwosu Jr [00:03.703]I’m tired man…
唉，我最近真是太累了...... [00:09.694]Sometimes I just sit in my room and hold my breath
有时我只想坐在房间里屏住呼吸 [00:15.191]And let all the pressure and anxiety build up
让我的压力和焦虑渐渐堆积 [00:19.193]And just let the time pass by
让时间在痛苦里缓缓锈蚀 [00:22.890]At first, I couldn’t breathe
最初，我感到难以呼吸 [00:24.394]Now I’m suffocating
而现在我因窒息在死亡线徘徊 [00:25.401]Maybe the pressure from the fame isn’t worth what I’m chasing
也许名誉带来的重压并不值得我的苦苦追寻 [00:28.896]I used to say God’s playing,
我曾说这是上帝在戏耍我的人生 [00:30.892]Now the devil’s on my team acting foul and it’s all flagrant
现在却是恶魔在我身边耍着骇人听闻的诡计 [00:34.145]Tryna push me off the path that I’m steady paving
他想将我推离我用心血铺砌的道路 [00:36.892]Sin is the currency and every day I’m making payments
罪恶流转，成为我每日偿还的血债 [00:39.890]I don’t wanna live in it but I heard a saying
我不愿活在负罪感中，但我听过一个古谚： [00:42.402]“Good knows evil cause the houses are both adjacent”
“善恶互流转，二者本相邻” [00:45.391]I don’t know if I should go for these goals
我不确定是否还要为目标追寻 [00:47.647]I’ve seen people gain the world but lose their souls
我看见所谓“人生赢家”选择出卖自己的灵魂 [00:50.393]My anxiety is building as the weight of it grows
我的焦虑在心底潜滋暗长，狰狞膨胀 [00:53.155]I succumb myself in privacy inside my home
我在家中独自向内心的欲望屈从 [00:56.150]And I barely answer calls and when I see my phone
我呆望着我的手机却难以将电话接通 [00:58.896]I’m reminded that the real feeling of being alone is having millions
我内心最真切的孤寂总被唤醒 [01:02.598]Who love you but can leave you or say that they hate you
当有无数人说着“我爱你”却不愿放手 [01:05.591]At the moment they don’t **** with a song
或仅仅因为讨厌一首歌而衍生出仇恨和咒骂 [01:07.608]I used to laugh it off
我曾对此一笑而过 [01:08.845]Now I hold my breath and suffocate
但我此时却忍受着窒息般的折磨 [01:10.842]Then I sit and wait just to see if I can kill the hate
我尝试用等待来消磨仇恨 [01:14.350]And as I’m fleeting I see God at the heaven’s gates
上帝与天堂大门仿佛就在眼前却转瞬即逝 [01:16.846]Then come back down to fight another day
我只能回到现实继续挣扎在生活的泥沼 [01:18.848]Then I grab that same phone and smile and wave
我只能握着手机，如机器般微笑着挥手 [01:21.850]And pour my empty heart into a song that they won’t praise
然后把我空虚的心注入一首得不到认可的歌中 [01:24.845]They say patience is the key but they didn’t tell me,
他们说“一切交给时间”但从未告知我 [01:27.852]While I wait I’ll be locked inside a steel cage
我越等待，我越会被这人生的铁笼监禁 [01:30.601]Something’s wrong, I feel claustrophobic
到底哪里出了问题？我感到幽闭恐惧 [01:32.845]I’m stuck living in the past and not the moment
我活在了过去的桎梏中而非享受当下 [01:35.593]Or the future where my life is only more broken
但我的未来已经注定更加穷困潦倒 [01:38.347]Cause those wounds from the past are still open
因为我过去的伤痕仍未愈合，鲜血如注 [01:41.346]I take sips of love and every single time it’s poison I see
我对爱总是浅尝辄止，但每次我却饮入鸩毒 [01:44.353]Women who can’t see past my employment
我看见那些盲目的女人因为职业而把我剔除在外 [01:46.846]Or see me as enjoyment so I can’t enjoy it cause the ride’s temporary
或者她们只把我当作玩物，这种短暂的爱我无福消受 [01:50.858]And they leave once they crash and destroy it
而她们一旦离去就会过河拆桥，毁掉一切 [01:52.848]I don’t think this life is healthy, why didn’t anybody tell me?
我活在病态的生活中，为什么没有人来拉我一把？ [01:55.344]Everybody want help but nobody wanna help me
所有人都渴望被救赎，却无人向我给予 [01:58.355]I’m an ATM, a therapist and everybody’s friendly
我是你们眼中的提款机，治疗专家，世界多友好啊 [02:01.102]And they hide their real intentions but my mind won’t let me
但你们都在隐藏真实的意图，我的良知却让我不要同流合污 [02:04.095]If I make a sad song, don’t ask me if I’m happy
如果我写了一首悲伤的歌，别明知故问我开不开心 [02:07.320]**** a hook, my pain isn't catchy
去你的hook吧，我的痛楚不需要抓耳动听 [02:09.814]If you relate, or worse feel badly,
如果你感同身受或者更加痛苦 [02:10.814]****ing pity me at least and check in if you at me
至少不要像圣母婊一样来同情我，一个点击足矣 [02:15.320]That’s the only way I’ll know who it touches
这是我知道谁与我共情的唯一方法 [02:17.571]That’s why I stay awake and answer DMs by the hundreds
这就是为何我会彻夜未眠地回复你们无数的消息 [02:20.312]So I don’t lose myself and fill my stomach with the feeling that
这也是为何我没有迷失自我，并仍然充斥着杂陈的情感 [02:23.315]I’m here just to suffocate for nothing
我在这不因为任何事而白白窒息 [02:26.065]If you know real pain then you see it when you look me in my eyes
如果你想见识一下真正的痛苦，只需凝视我的双眸 [02:29.563]I try to hide it but they do not lie
我想将他们隐藏，但情绪不会说谎 [02:32.816]I wanna sleep but if I try,
我也愿每夜安眠，但每次我尝试 [02:35.856]The demons who creep in my dreams will collide
我就会与梦中潜伏的恶魔发生冲突 [02:38.066]So I stay up and I stare at the ceiling
所以我夜夜难眠，呆呆地注视着天花板 [02:40.317]And ask myself if I should even share these feelings
内心矛盾，考虑该不该将这负能量播撒 [02:43.070]Then I hear a voice in the distance from a ghost-like image
这时我仿佛听见远方鬼影的绰绰低语 [02:46.315]Saying my pain could be somebody’s healing
我的苦楚可能成为某人的良方 [02:48.815]So I close my eyes and drift to the place that inspires these lyrics
所以我闭上双眼，进入激发着我歌词灵感的心灵炼狱 [02:54.818]And as I see flames and I scream,
那里遍地炽焰，我失声尖叫 [02:57.018]I pray it’s a place you’ll never have to visit
我希望，你们永远不要到此造访