hospital visit-Vern Matz

[00:00.000] 作词 : Daniel Belgrad [00:01.000] 作曲 : Daniel Belgrad [00:09.104]Father visited me in New York for about a week [00:15.108]And at the end I started getting a pretty bad headache [00:22.105]About an hour later it was a pretty bad migraine [00:26.017]The lights dancing around in my left eye [00:30.107]I didn’t have much vision [00:35.108]Took some of this medicine called Imitrex [00:38.107]It was my first time [00:46.024]Just thought it help but [00:50.106]About fifteen minutes after that I started to get lightheaded [00:53.109]I call him in [00:55.108]All of a sudden I collapse on my right side can’t feel my left side [01:00.008]Breathing pretty heavy but I can’t quite breath [01:02.103]And I say call the paramedics I can’t feel my arms or my legs [01:06.209]And I feel a little crazy like I’m gonna faint or something [01:13.036]It all goes black for about four minutes [01:16.108]And then I wake up to the paramedics over my head [01:20.031]And I feel a little embarrassed but I still feel sick [01:30.110]Feel so ridiculous going through all these things [01:33.103]Over and over again but I feel it in my body [01:37.104]And so I feel like I gotta say something [01:39.114]So about a couple hours in the ER [01:42.109]I’m just sitting there thinking about [01:45.103]Well I don’t know what I was a thinking about [01:53.108]Now it’s the next day and I’m writing a song [01:55.106]Trying to piece through this experience [01:59.102]Which might seem a little silly [02:01.112]But it makes me feel like a little bit of a clown [02:05.068]But I have these dreams for about four years [02:07.104]And then it’s weird when they start appearing in real life [02:11.104]I talk real fast and I get all cold [02:14.109]And the girls I meet don’t like me much cause I just stare off into space [02:22.047]But I ain’t tryna to be like that [02:27.041]I ain’t tryna to be like that [02:31.111]I ain’t tryna be that person [02:39.056]I know pretty well how to be well liked [02:42.036]I just smile a lot and act pretty warm [02:44.102]And it’s honestly not an act [02:46.109]I enjoy it, I enjoy making people happy [02:54.109]When I get sick it starts to get real hard to be that kind of person [03:00.205]And so I push myself in that direction and I just end up like the wintertime [03:06.107]Real cold and real hollow and real dark [03:25.105]I’m trying new stream of consciousness type stuff [03:29.164]Cause I listened to Field Medic the other week [03:31.108]While I was playing EarthBound on a trundle bed in New York City [03:44.041]How am i doing [03:47.105]How am i doing [03:50.081]How am i doing I ask myself in the mirror [03:54.056]Where I scratched a couple words in the wall [03:57.044]So that when the shower fogs up it says I’m okay [04:01.076]It says I’m getting better, it says it’s gonna be alright [04:05.109]And I say it four times to myself [04:08.109]Cause that’s what they taught me in Minnesota [04:11.108]Where I went to a pain rehab clinic [04:15.105]With a couple other people in their 30s and 40s [04:18.170]A lot of them didn’t have kids, they said maybe that’s why [04:20.105]We’re so sick and we’re so sorry [04:24.102]We’re such sorry people [04:27.102]About in the end of November I went to a mall [04:30.107]Talked to some other people from the city [04:33.104]They said life was real depressing [04:36.073]They were buying their parents a psychology book for Christmas [04:41.101]Cause their parents didn’t understand why they were so ****ed u [04:47.104]And honestly they didn’t understand it either [04:51.069]This was just a 16 year old kid [04:54.048]Didn’t know much about the world but it made him sad [05:08.058]And it made me pretty sad talking to him