Ex-Boyfriend-Lil Dicky

[00:01.150] [00:04.830]Aka Mr. Leftward sloping ***** [00:09.100]I got a story for you all now a€“ Yes sir. [00:14.060]Now I been dating this girl named Katie, she hot as hell [00:17.390]And her body crazy, v****a shaven and it dona€?t smell [00:23.690]Body sickening, plus she really good at making breaded chicken [00:26.950]Got me thing she the one man, even fully clothed, shawty really fun [00:30.280]Get a lotta hos, but none of those come close [00:32.340]I swear this the most that Ia€?ve felt so damn exposed [00:34.210]Oh yeah, therea€?s one more thing and I know this s*it gonna sound insane [00:37.400]But I still havena€?t hit it I admit it, I wish I was kidding [00:40.160]And I dona€?t fall for chickens, but this one a little different [00:41.120]Never been up inside before, because shea€?s only **** one guy before [00:44.390]And though I really wanna boink this whore [00:45.860]She my sweetie 3.14 [00:47.630]So Ia€?m staying patient, and masterbating, and now my heart is sorta racing [00:51.310]Cuz she said tonight will be the night we do some fornicating [00:54.700]Hell yeah, Ia€?m down, Ia€?m about to go all out [00:58.090]Ia€?m gonna poud that crazy, like an elaborate black man handshake [01:01.230]But on the way to the crib, we pass this kid, and he seem to know who Katie is [01:04.620]So I say a€?who thisa€? and she say *****, this is my ex boyfriend Jim [01:08.350]And I aina€?t usually the one to be the jealous type [01:11.220]But as Ia€?m looking at this dude I cana€?t believe my eyes [01:14.650]Cuz hea€?s the best looking guy that Ia€?ve seen in my whole life [01:20.850]Hea€?s got the thickest head of hair, chiseled jaw, an egregious bod [01:24.870]Man this the closest thing Ia€?ve seen to a Grecian god [01:28.670]And now Ia€?m looking at my chick, cuz his *****€?s been inside her raw [01:33.680]Aww damn [01:35.900]Man this is crazy, I cana€?t believe this guy used to **** my lady [01:39.660]I bet he left that ***** ravaged like Haiti [01:41.960]Katiea€?s huggin and squeezing his shoulder blades Katie [01:44.480]And Ia€?m buggin and queasy, this aint okay [01:46.020]And then they say, a€?leta€?s get drinksa€? so I say okay [01:48.150]Even though I was about to get laid [01:49.550]Man this ******* look like Ashton, combined with a lil Hugh Jackman [01:53.210]In other words, hea€?s so damn attractive [01:54.670]So damn tan he gotta have a little black in him [01:56.470]Now Ia€?m in the back with him, sippin on some yak with him [01:58.320]And he paying for it all, he inves**ent banking [01:59.890]Ia€?m acting, like I aint distracted [02:01.400] [02:03.220]An dnow Ia€?m feeling pissed, so I go and take a piss [02:06.290]Mid stream, I look left and guess who it is [02:09.800]And I had to see, and I was mad discrete [02:11.740]And I got on my toes and I took a little peek [02:13.690]Oh my god Becky, look at that c**k [02:16.530]And I aina€?t usually the one to be the jealous type [02:19.810]But as Ia€?m looking at his ****, I cana€?t believe my eyes [02:23.220]Cuz hea€?s got the biggest c**k that Ia€?ve seen in my whole life [02:29.130]And now Ia€?m staring at this dudea€?s soft **** with a lotta hate [02:33.310]Because the s*it is plus 8 like Jon and Kate [02:36.880]And I dona€?t know if I can date my girl after tonight [02:42.660]Aw damn [02:44.370]I dona€?t know what to do, dudea€?s **** is really huge [02:47.790]I didna€?t realize a ***** could be so smooth [02:51.120]I know shea€?s missing that, my ***** isna€?t that [02:54.530]Ia€?m looking closer, I think that his **** has abs [02:57.840] [03:01.160]Ita€?s so long and thick, Ita€?s like a punching bag [03:04.740]Ia€?m saying ita€?s so shaven, head is amazing [03:06.870]Got my **** looking like a raisin [03:08.280]Skin tone insane, man hea€?s hung like Saddam Hussain, its crazy [03:11.910]What the **** should I do? [03:13.590]He gotta Rutha€?s Chris ****, and minea€?s a drive thru [03:16.960] [03:19.970]Cuz I simply cana€?t survive [03:21.810]After seeing what was in between his thighs, so I tell her [03:25.500]That this dudea€?s gotta **** that I dona€?t comprehend [03:28.340]I had to move my neck to see it end to end [03:31.790]I mean the physics of his **** just dona€?t make any sense [03:37.750]And I think ita€?s for the best if this comes to an end [03:41.970]Because the *** with him must have been the best [03:45.540]And I would say leta€?s just be friends [03:48.280]But I think I would just think about his **** all the time, so goodbye [03:52.550]Then she told me ***** I dona€?t really know what to say [03:55.690]Because I dated this dude in second grade [03:56.160]So I dona€?t know about his ****, now leta€?s go home and get you laid [04:05.100]And then I took her to my crib, and you know that we belly slapped [04:09.920]And I gave her an O like I was selling crack, and when I came [04:14.040] [04:20.040]