Cantina-Voltaire

[00:16.157]Well I went down to Mos Eisley for a converter [00:23.549]Hell you know how hot it gets on Tatooine [00:31.386]Well then I saw that there cantina [00:35.644]I'll go in for an Orangina [00:39.484]I heard it was rough, but how bad could it be? [00:47.086]Well I walked through the door, and the music stopped (dead... ) [00:54.740]All manner of men and beasts were staring at me [01:02.367]Seems just one week before, [01:06.155]Their Twi'lek slave girl walked out the door [01:10.753]And I guess I was the next best thing they'd seen [01:18.589]I lost more than my heart in that Cantina [01:26.139]I left my manhood there on Tatooine [01:34.158]Son, it don't mean you're weak [01:37.528]If you turn the other cheek [01:41.917]But if you spread 'em both for Jabba, son, you ain't a man [01:57.538]I was hit over the head by ol' Han Solo [02:04.983]I'd have never guessed that pirate was a homo [02:12.950]I woke up next to Chewbacca [02:17.077]I was smeared in Wookiee ca-ca [02:22.537]And what they did to my poor nipples was a no-no [02:30.870]Oh Greedo greedily grabbed his green weenie [02:38.420]And he yanked that sucker 'til it wasn't so teeny [02:46.230]He pulled me into Jabba's hut [02:49.678]He stared intently at my butt [02:55.556]And then he oo-ta-too-ta'ed me with his zucchini [03:04.046]I lost more than my heart in that Cantina [03:11.830]I left my manhood there on Tatooine [03:19.432]Son, it don't mean you're weak [03:22.906]If you turn the other cheek [03:27.295]But if you spread 'em both for Jabba, son, you ain't a man [03:32.284]Take it away, boys... [03:33.904](band instrumental) [04:06.269]Well the guy walked up and said, "My friend doesn't like you." [04:12.251](I said, "Sorry.") [04:14.028]He said "I don't like you either, you better watch yourself." [04:19.331](I think his name was Tom Waits) [04:21.864]Then some old dude who taught Vader [04:25.365]Chopped his arm off with a saber [04:29.988]That later made for one red hot anal invader [04:37.747]I was broken on the floor beat to a stupor [04:45.113]Then I was saved; there at the door were ten stormtroopers [04:52.846]But then my hope faded away [04:57.104]I didn't know they cloned 'em gay [05:02.694]And they each took turns stormtroopin' me in the pooper [05:10.975]I lost more than my heart in that Cantina [05:18.759]I left my manhood there on Tatooine [05:26.517]Son, it don't mean you're weak [05:30.018]If you turn the other cheek [05:34.485]Which is why I still go there every week.