Lullaby for Spiders-秋观地

[00:25.620]She first saw it behind the sugar jar [00:31.830]她第一次看见它，是在糖罐后面 [00:32.700]Legspan of a thumbnail, brown, unremarkable [00:35.430]身躯张开只有指甲盖大小，褐色，毫不起眼 [00:37.560]Shedidn't kill it. That was the decision. [00:40.680]她没有打死它。那一刻她就做了决定。 [00:43.740]Every night after that,2:30 AM, it was there [00:46.260]从那以后，每天凌晨两点半，它都会待在那里 [00:48.840]"You're early,"she'd say, or" Late again" [00:55.140]她会轻声说：“你今天来得早”，或是“又迟到了” [00:59.970]It never moved when she spoke [01:02.460]她说话时，它始终一动不动 [01:05.430]She told it about the divorce, the diagnosis [01:09.390]她向它倾诉离婚的变故、确诊的噩耗 [01:10.350]The way her daughter stopped calling on Tuesdays [01:13.260]还有女儿再也不在周二打来电话的落寞 [01:15.840]It listened. Ordidn't. The distinction blurred. [01:19.440]它像是在倾听，又或许没有。界限早已模糊不清。 [01:25.110]She started leaving crumbs, a breadcrumb trail [01:30.240]她开始留下面包屑，在台面铺成一路碎屑 [01:32.640]Of confessions, on the countertop [01:36.990]也铺下了满心无处诉说的心事 [01:37.830]" I never loved him. I loved the idea of not being alone." [01:43.770]“我从来没爱过他，我只是贪恋不孤单的错觉。” [01:45.840]The spider ate nothing. Spidersdon't eat breadcrumbs. [01:49.080]那只蜘蛛从不吃东西，蜘蛛本就不吃面包屑。 [01:52.230]But she kept leaving them. [01:55.590]可她还是日复一日地留着。 [01:57.960]Then one night, the jar was clean [02:00.690]后来某天夜里，糖罐摆放如初 [02:04.680]The counter empty, the corner bare [02:07.500]台面空空荡荡，角落再无踪迹 [02:11.430]She stood there until4:00 AM [02:13.290]她静静站着，一直到凌晨四点 [02:15.240]Waiting to tell it about the good news [02:21.240]等着把好消息讲给它听 [02:21.900]The test results, the remission [02:24.690]检查结果出来了，病情已然缓解 [02:26.610]Thedaughter's Tuesday call [02:28.440]女儿也重新在周二打来了电话 [02:32.670]There was no one to not listen [02:43.710]却再也没有那个沉默倾听的对象 [03:08.940]She found a new spider in the bathroom, smaller [03:12.000]她在浴室发现了一只新的蜘蛛，比原先那只更小 [03:13.290]Shedidn't speak to it [03:14.760]她没有和它说话 [03:15.720]She swept it into the dustpan, flushed it [03:17.760]用簸箕扫起，冲进了下水道 [03:19.980]Went back to the kitchen [03:22.530]她走回厨房 [03:22.860]Stared at the empty corner [03:24.990]凝望着那个空荡荡的角落 [03:26.550]Until the sun came up [03:28.620]就这样伫立到天色破晓 [03:31.620]And she could see her own face [03:33.630]终于看清了自己的模样 [03:34.650]Reflected in the sugar jar [03:41.880]倒映在冰凉的糖罐表面