A Portrait Of-Sorority Noise

[00:00.00]I've been feeling suicidal [00:02.53]And if I need remind you [00:03.89]It's not the coming of my heart and my brain [00:06.90]I was thinking about how great [00:08.52]It would be if I could make the tightness in my chest go away [00:12.43]It's been a while since I've seen God [00:14.70]And I'm not trying to lead him on [00:17.81]But he's always trying to **** me [00:19.52]To the tune of my favorite song [00:23.66]And they're playing "The '59 Sound" in heaven [00:26.32]While the angels were drinking up whiskey and Cokes [00:30.04]It's hard to freeze your anxieties [00:32.74]When your best friends' torching your coat [00:35.80]Your coat [00:59.64]Drop that phone, drink a glass of water [01:01.76]And call me when you get in your bed [01:04.81]I've seen inside your head [01:06.72]And I'm doing the surgery on the parts [01:09.14]That still wish you were dead [01:11.96]'Cause I've lost too many friends [01:14.72]So I'll say it again and again [01:17.91]And again and again [01:19.32]And again and again [01:20.78]And again and again [01:22.73]I'm not trying to say it's easy [01:25.14]But I'm trying to say it's fine [01:28.30]I've still got your demons [01:29.96]And they're not gonna be leaving any time [01:33.39]Any time soon [01:38.82]Any time soon [01:44.28]Any time soon [01:50.22]Any time soon [02:03.48]I'm not trying to say it's easy [02:05.79]But I'm trying to say it's fine [02:22.09]Since I was thirteen I’ve dealt with manic depression [02:24.40]and I had a difficult time comprehending the things that I wanted to be [02:27.83]and I lived a very happy life [02:29.24]and I was turning eighteen and I was doing everything I could to try to make myself feel better [02:33.65]but I felt an absence, [02:34.86]I felt like I needed to die, [02:35.96]I felt like nothing existed [02:38.23]and I felt that I wasn't worthwhile breathing the same air as the ones I loved and my family, [02:43.31]and then it came to the point where I started losing friends who had the same ******* ideas as myself [02:48.46]but I have to be strong and I have to live my life as a continuation of theirs lost [02:52.63]and I have to do everything in my ******* power to be the person that I can be [02:57.52]and live my life the best way I ******* can [03:00.29]and some days it's so hard to ******* stand [03:04.01]and ******* stand [03:05.72]and ******* stand [03:07.23]and ******* stand