Kids-Eminem

[00:01.98]Okay children quiet down, quiet down
好了孩子们安静 都给我安静 [00:05.12]Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day
今天我要介绍新来的代课老师 [00:09.53]His name is Mr. Shady
他的名字是Shady先生 [00:11.87]Children quiet down please
孩子们请保持安静 [00:14.36]Brian don't throw that （SHUT UP!）Brian
布莱恩别扔东西（闭嘴！）布莱恩 [00:15.54]Mr. Shady will be your new substituteShady
Shady先生将是你们的新代课老师 [00:20.39]Good luck Mr. ShadyShady
祝你好运Shady老师 [00:22.25]Hi there little boys and girls (**** YOU!)
小朋友们好啊（去你的！） [00:23.70]Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels
今天我们要学怎么毒死松鼠 [00:26.48]But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob （Huh?）
首先介绍我的朋友鲍勃（嗯？） [00:28.64]Say hi Bob! （"Hi Bob"） Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom
打招呼啊鲍勃！（"嗨鲍勃"）这货三十岁还啃老 [00:32.03]and he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot
没有工作 整天在家飞叶子 [00:33.87]but his twelve-year old brother looks up to him an awful lot
但他十二岁的弟弟却把他当偶像 [00:37.50]And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spotBob
鲍勃最爱泡在松饼店里 [00:39.49]and wait in the parking lot for waitresses off the clock
在停车场等女服务员下班 [00:42.14]when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog
夜深时假装遛狗跟踪她们 [00:45.28]Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks （AHH!）
拖进树林直接送上砧板（啊！） [00:47.59]And even if they escaped and they got the cops
就算她们报警逃脱 [00:50.16]the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge
也会因恐惧撤销指控 [00:53.11]'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job
直到某晚史黛西女士下班 [00:55.22]when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk
被捂住嘴警告不许声张 [00:58.22]But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off
她知道是鲍勃却挣脱不开 [01:00.78]But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker
因为这疯子已经彻底癫狂 [01:03.23]Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka
比喝醉的Slim Shady还疯狂 [01:05.70]You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr."
带他看医生都没法收场 [01:08.72]He grabbed S tace' by the legs as chopped it off her
他抓住史黛西双腿直接砍断 [01:11.29]and dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her
把残肢扔进湖里等人发现 [01:13.96]But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander
但自从史黛西失踪那天 [01:16.65]they never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner
鲍勃依然在松饼店流连 [01:19.20]And that's the story of Bob and his mother****ing b***h,
这就是人渣鲍勃的故事 [01:21.69]and what it might do to you
告诉你吸毒什么下场 [01:23.46]So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you
问问松鼠想不想尝——这东西有害健康 [01:25.44]See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon）
孩子们 毒品害人呐（来吧） [01:27.41]and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man）
不信就问你老爸（问他呀） [01:30.34]and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right）
还不信就问你妈（没错） [01:32.59]She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will）
她会说自己天天嗨（真的） [01:35.10]So kids say no to drugs （that's right）
所以远离毒品（对） [01:38.13]So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh）
别像其他人那样堕落（嗯哼） [01:40.62]Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along）
道理就这么简单（跟我唱） [01:43.17]Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
毒品就是坏东西 懂吗？ [01:45.92]My d**k is the size of a peanut, have you seen it?
我老二小得像花生 见过没？ [01:48.66]**** NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?)
见个屁 就花生那么大（哈？） [01:51.42]Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels?
说到花生 知道松鼠还怕什么？ [01:54.67]Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world
摇头丸是世上最毒的药 [01:56.37]If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it
要是有人给你 千万别碰 [01:58.72]Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid
两粒就能吸干你的脊髓液 [02:01.68]and spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back
脊髓液没了就彻底完蛋 [02:04.18]So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back
别留恋 它会啃光你脊椎 [02:06.53]Meet Zach, twenty-one years old
扎克二十一岁 [02:09.07]After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold
在兄弟会派对逞能 [02:12.03]and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys
被五个人怂恿试了五粒 [02:14.62]and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it
同龄压力永远难以抗拒 [02:17.65]Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive
突然他抽搐脉搏狂飙 [02:20.89]and his eyes roll back in his skull {blblblblblb}
眼珠翻白口吐白沫 [02:22.65]His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches
后背弓成麦当劳拱门 [02:25.60]He's on Donald's carpet, layin horizontal barfin {BLEH}他在Donald的地毯上，
他在Donald的地毯上， [02:27.39]And everyone in the apartment starts laughin at him
公寓里所有人都在嘲笑 [02:30.18]"Hey Adam, Zach is a jackass, look at him!"
"亚当快看扎克这傻样！" [02:32.62]cause they took it too, so they think it's funny
因为他们也嗨了觉得好笑 [02:35.36]So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money
其实只是在笑他白花钱 [02:38.03]Meanwhile, Zach's in a coma, the action is over
扎克昏迷时闹剧结束 [02:40.30]and his back and his shoulders hunched up like he's practicin yoga
肩膀耸着像在练瑜伽 [02:43.56]And that's the story of Zach, the ecstasy maniac
这就是瘾君子扎克的故事 [02:45.85]So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you
所以别拿这玩意喂松鼠 [02:49.57]See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon）
孩子们 毒品害人呐（来吧） [02:51.79]and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man）
不信就问你老爸（问他呀） [02:53.91]and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right）
还不信就问你妈（没错） [02:56.20]She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will）
她会说自己天天嗨（真的） [02:59.08]So kids say no to drugs （that's right）
所以远离毒品（对） [03:01.93]So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh）
别像其他人那样堕落（嗯哼） [03:04.53]Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along）
道理就这么简单（跟我唱） [03:07.56]Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
毒品就是坏东西 懂吗？ [03:09.61]And last but not least, one of the most humungous
最后但同样重要 [03:13.19]problems among young people today, is fungus
年轻人最大的问题是致幻菇 [03:15.43]It grows from cow manure, they pick it out, wipe it off,
从牛粪里长出来 挖出来晒干 [03:17.90]bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it
装袋后直接塞进嘴咀嚼 [03:20.57]Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff
嚼着嚼着就开始犯傻 [03:23.15]And everything slows down when you eat some of 'em..
吃了这东西什么都变慢 [03:26.47]And sometimes you see things that aren't there （Like what?）
有时会看见幻象（比如？） [03:28.79]Like fat woman in G-strings with orange hair
比如穿丁字裤的橙发肥婆 [03:31.11]（Mr. Shady what's a G-string?） It's yarn Claire（Mr. Shady
（老师什么是丁字裤？）是毛线克莱尔 [03:33.70]Women stick 'em up their behinds, go out and wear 'em （Huh?）
女人塞屁股里穿出门（啥？） [03:37.02]And if you swallow too much of the magic mushrooms
要是魔法蘑菇吃太多 [03:39.68]Whoops, did I say magic mushrooms?
哎呀我说漏嘴了？ [03:42.05]I meant fungus Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue （How come?）
是毒蘑菇 舌头会肿得像牛舌 [03:45.97]cause it comes from a cow's dung （Gross!!）
因为长在牛粪上（恶心！！） [03:47.95]See drugs are bad, it's a common fact
毒品有害是常识 [03:49.45]But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at （Oh!）
但你爸妈知道我就擅长这个（哦！） [03:52.50]But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D.
别学我 要是你们嗑药过量 [03:55.11]They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to grow a goatee
他们会来找我算账 [03:57.65]and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault
我得留胡子伪装躲藏 [04:00.39]So don't do drugs, and do exactly as I don't,
所以别吸毒 别学我 [04:02.53]cause I'm bad for you
因为我是反面教材 [04:04.10]See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon）
孩子们 毒品害人呐（来吧） [04:06.23]and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man）
不信就问你老爸（问他呀） [04:08.86]and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right）
还不信就问你妈（没错） [04:11.14]She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will）
她会说自己天天嗨（真的） [04:14.14]So kids say no to drugs （that's right）
所以远离毒品（对） [04:16.86]So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh）
别像其他人那样堕落（嗯哼） [04:19.82]Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along）
道理就这么简单（跟我唱） [04:22.17]Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?
毒品就是坏东西 懂吗？ [04:25.40]Come on children, clap along （SHUT UP!）
来孩子们 拍手唱（闭嘴！） [04:27.31]Sing along children (Suck my mother****ing d**k!)
一起唱（舔老子的屌！） [04:29.64]Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad （South Park is gonna sue me!）
毒品有害 毒品有害（南方公园要告我了！） [04:31.73]So don't do drugs (Suck my mother****ing balls!)
所以别吸毒（舔老子的蛋！） [04:34.11]so there'll be more for me （Hippie! God damnit!）
这样才够我吸（嬉皮士！该死！） [04:50.74](So, ****ed up, right now..)
(我现在嗨爆了..)