Friends S01E22-英语听力

[00:02.910]-Shut up. -Tell me what? [00:05.320]You won't look at him. [00:06.920]I could use another reason why women won't look at me. [00:11.090]All right. All right. Last night,I had a dream... [00:15.830]...that you and I were [00:18.400]Doing it on this table. [00:22.500]Excellent dream score. [00:28.910]Why would you dream that? [00:32.410]More importantly... [00:34.010]...was I any good? [00:36.720]Well,you were pretty damn good. [00:39.720]Interesting. In my dreams, I'm surprisingly inadequate. [00:45.220]Last night,you seemed to know your way around the table. [00:52.300]I love it when we share. [00:58.600]You okay? [00:59:000]I cant believe you two have *** in the dream! [01:03.710]Sorry,it was a one-time thing. [01:05.880]I was very drunk,and it was someone else's subconscious. [01:10.820]The One With The lck Factor [01:59.330]Hello,Rachel. [02:01.200]Get off. [02:05.270]Ooh,give me. Can you see me operating a drill press? [02:15.780]Why would you want to? [02:18.650]For short-term work. Till I get back my massage clients. [02:22.820]Pirates again? [02:25.060]No. Nothing like that. [02:27.730]I'm just such a dummy. [02:30.130]I taught a "Massage Yourself at Home" workshop. And they are. [02:36.100]Hey,Chan,she could work for you. [02:39.100]Thanks,Joey. That's a good idea. [02:41.910]I could. I could do it. What is it? [02:45.010]My secretary's gonna be out. She's having one of her boobs reduced. [02:50.480]It's a whole big boob story. [02:53.320]-I could be a secretary. -I don't know if it'd be your thing... - [02:58.000]... because it involves being normal for a large portion of the day. - [03:03.290]I could do that. [03:06.560]-What's that? -My new beeper. [03:08.930]Why does a paleontologist need a beeper? [03:11.640]Is it for dinosaur emergencies? Help. They're still extinct. [03:17.240]It's for when Carol goes into labor. [03:25.420]A cool number and a possible name for the kid. [03:29.090]-See you later. -Off to see young Ethan? - [03:32.220]Thank you. [03:34.490]How young is young Ethan? Young? [03:38.100]He's our age. [03:40.570]When we were.... [03:45.900]-He's a senior in college. -College? - [03:49.670]Rob that cradle. [03:52.580]He's smart and mature and grown-up. [03:56.410]Mature and grown-up,he's a big boy. [04:01.690]This man-child has no problem with how old you are? [04:04.860]No,of course not. It's not even an issue... [04:08.260]... because I said I was 22. [04:10.130]-You what? -What? [04:11.630]-Oh,I can't pass for 22? -Well,maybe 25,26. [04:15.430]-I am 26. -There you go. [04:30.920]Can you hear that? [04:36.550]That'll stop when you pick up the phone. [04:41.460]-Oh,I'm on. -Okay. [04:45.500]Mr. Bing's office. [04:49.800]-Sorry,he's in a meeting. -I'm not in a meeting. - [04:54.070]Will he know what this is in reference to? [04:58.810]I'll see that he gets the message. Bye-bye. [05:05.080]Ross says hi. [05:07.620]This is so fun. What do we do now? [05:10.460]Well,now I actually have to get to work. [05:13.520]"Most likely." [05:19.200]Okay,I'm gonna be out there. [05:21.630]All right. Bye-bye. [05:23.770]Bye-bye. [05:30.880]-Yes? -What you doing? [05:40.550]BeIt's too tight. Gotta change. [05:43.090]Did I turn the fish? Nope,because I made lasagna. [05:47.790]-Am I out of control? -Just a touch. - [05:51.660]I don't understand. You've been dating this guy since... [05:55.630]... his midterms. … [05:58.240]Why,all of a sudden, are you so...? [06:04.810]-What? -Could tonight be the night? [06:11.020]I don't know. He's a great guy... [06:14.190]...and I love being with him. But,you know... [06:17.860]...things happen when they happen. You don't plan these things. [06:23.130]-So,did you shave your legs? -Yeah. - [06:29.930]Would you let it go? It was just a dream. [06:33.140]It doesn't mean [06:36.710]This is it. It's baby time! [06:39.240]All right,relax. Just relax. Be cool. [06:47.590]No,Andre is not here. Third time today. [06:52.560]Yes,I am sure. [06:55.330]I do not perform those kind of services. [06:58.930]Services? [07:00.670]Oh,services. [07:02.570]Yeah,you want 55-JUMBO. [07:09.640]That's right. [07:11.310]That's right. JUMBO with a "U," sir. [07:14.580]You don't want me. [07:16.350]Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment. [07:20.790]Alrighty,bye-bye. [07:26.690]How was the first day? [07:28.760]Excellent. Everyone was so,so nice. [07:32.300]It pays to know the man who wears my shoes. [07:36.330]Me. [07:39.270]-I didn't tell anyone I knew you. -Why? - [07:44.710]They don't like you. [07:50.010]-What? -I thought you knew. - [07:55.150]-Who doesn't like me? -Everyone. - [07:58.460]Except for.... [08:00.360]No. Everyone. [08:04.700]-What are you talking about? -Don't feel bad. - [08:10.400]But you got promoted,and now you're Mr. Boss Man. Mr. Big. [08:15.410]Mr. Bing. Boss Man Bing. [08:19.640]-I can't believe it. -Yeah. They even do you. - [08:24.650]They "do" me? [08:26.850]You know,like,okay: [08:29.320]"Could that report be any later?" [08:37.360]-I don't sound like that. -Yeah,you do. - [08:45.300]...of music." [08:52.640]"My scone. My scone." [08:57.780]I don't sound like that. That is so not true. [09:03.320]That is so not That is so not [09:05.560]That Oh,shut up. [09:11.330]-Did not. -Up until I was 9... - [09:14.230]... I thought "gunpoint" was a place where crimes happened. [09:17.900]-How's that possible? -It's always on the news. - [09:21.140]"A man is being held up at Gunpoint." [09:23.940]"Tourists are terrorized at Gunpoint." [09:26.740]And I kept thinking, "Why do people continue to go there?" [09:35.590]I should go. [09:46.600]-Unless -What? [09:49.800]Unless you wanna stay over. [09:52.170]I mean,I'm going to. So.... [09:56.640]Yeah,I'd really like that. [10:06.050]Before we get into any staying-over stuff... [10:10.560]...there's something you should know. [10:13.220]Is this,like, "I have an early class tomorrow"... [10:16.730]...or "I'm secretly married to a goat"? [10:19.900]Well,it's somewhere in between. [10:23.700]You see,in a strictly technical sense,of course,I'm not.... [10:28.140]Well,I mean,I haven't ever.... [10:31.210]Ethan? [10:33.180]Are you a virgin? [10:34.880]If that's what you kids are calling it these days,then... [10:39.250]...yes,I am. [10:43.420]I mean,you're just such a good kisser I would never have known. [10:48.330]Well,I've excelled at every level I've been to,I just.... [10:55.200]I just haven't been to that particular one yet. [10:59.340]I've kind of been waiting for the right person. [11:04.110]-Really? -Yeah. [11:07.750]You do know I was talking about you,right? [11:19.190]Wow. [11:21.760]You keep saying that. [11:23.860]You know,you read about it. You see it in the movies. [11:27.530]Even when you practice it at home, man,oh,man... [11:31.540]...it is nothing like that. [11:36.810]Listen,listen. [11:40.610]You told me something that was really difficult for you. [11:45.080]And I figure if you can be honest,then I can too. [11:55.000]Nothing wrong about that. [12:00.630]Here goes. [12:03.470]I'm not 22. [12:09.610]...and 1 3 months. [12:17.750]What does it matter how old we are? Basically,I'm nuts about you. [12:22.890]I knew after the first time we kissed. You didn't mention the Tic Tac. [12:28.030]I just thought you were naturally minty. [12:34.630]Listen... [12:36.600]...as long as we're telling stuff... [12:40.770]... I have another one for you. [12:43.610]I'm a little younger than I said. [12:48.110]-You're not a senior? -Oh,I'm a senior... - [12:55.720]...in high school. [13:08.500]What we did was wrong. [13:10.570]I just had *** with someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial. [13:18.310]I just had ***. [13:22.680]Ethan,focus. How could you not tell me? [13:26.220]-You never said your age. -It's different. - [13:29.050]My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states. [13:33.890]-What were you thinking? -I was too busy falling - [13:37.230]-Don't say it. -ln love with you. [13:45.070]Well,fall out of it. [13:46.800]You shouldn't be here. It's a school night. [13:52.240]Oh,God. [13:54.310]I'm like those women that you see... [13:56.810]...with shiny guys named Chad. [14:02.420]I'm Joan Collins. [14:07.590]Who? [14:17.170]Andre should be there in about 45 minutes. [14:23.510]Yes,sir,the kimonos are extra. [14:28.110]Alrighty. Bye-bye. [14:32.450]It's just easier that way. [14:36.250]-You told me about the last dream. -No. Forget it. - [14:40.620]Why not? Was I doing something particularly saucy? [14:46.760]All right. Fine. [14:53.640]Joey was there too. [14:57.270]All right. [15:05.250]...anybody else there? [15:09.220]You sure? Nobody... [15:11.420]... handing out mints or anything? … [15:16.060]No,it was just the three of us. [15:20.730]So was it you and Chandler... [15:22.730]...then you and me, or you,me and Chandler? [15:27.500]-You know what? -What? [15:30.470]There were times... [15:32.580]...when it wasn't even me. … [15:44.420]That is so sweet,you guys. [15:53.530]Mon,Ethan called again. [16:02.640]-What? -Ethan called again. - [16:06.440]-You're not seeing him anymore? -No. - [16:09.780]Sometimes,things don't work out. [16:12.380]This has nothing to do with him needing a note to get out of gym? [16:20.620]I did not say anything. I swear. [16:23.930]-He stopped by. -Next time you talk to him... - [16:33.140]Oh,my life is just so amusing. Can we drop it now? [16:37.140]Sorry. [16:39.010]"It's morphin'time." [16:40.640]-Stegosaurus. -Tyrannosaurus. [16:47.890]I gotta go. [16:49.590]Head rush. [16:53.090]One more,and then I have to go. [16:56.030]Cool. [17:00.900]Where you going? [17:02.770]A birthday party with some work people. [17:05.600]Work people? Nobody told me. [17:09.540]I know. That's part of the whole... [17:12.040]...them-not-liking-you extravaganza. … [17:16.650]A month ago, these people were my friends. [17:19.920]I'm in charge, but I'm not a different person. [17:23.250]Then come,hang out. Let them see what a great guy you still are. [17:28.290]-You think I should? -I really do. - [17:32.560]But could we not go together? [17:35.900]I don't wanna be the geek who invited the boss. [17:43.410]-Hey,you okay? -Yeah. [17:46.240]-This can't be easy for him either. -I know. - [17:51.080]This may take some time for him to get over it... [17:55.420]... but,then at four, Muppet Babies is on. [18:06.000]Go deep. Deep. Deep. [18:10.770]Sorry,Shelly. [18:14.870]See,with the fun? [18:18.310]Last night was great. [18:20.040]The karaoke thing? Tracy and I doing "Ebony and lvory." [18:27.480]-What? -Now you're Mr. Caring Boss. - [18:30.450]Mr. I'm-one-of-you Boss. “ [18:32.190]Mr. I-wanna-be-your-buddy Boss Man Bing. “ [18:36.290]Then I don't get it. [18:38.800]You know what? I think you just gotta face it. [18:42.770]You're the guy in the big office. [18:45.440]You're the one that hires and fires them. [18:48.540]-They say you're a great boss. -They do? - [18:52.440]But they're not your friends anymore. [18:55.150]-I just want -But you can't. - [18:58.120]But I just want [19:10.060]Are you gonna? [19:11.330]Carol and I have a new system. If she punches in 9-1 -1... [19:15.300]...she's having a baby. Otherwise,I just ignore it. [19:18.900]What about Andre? [19:20.370]He got a call from our cousin,Nathan. [19:23.640]Frankly,it was a little more than I needed to know. [19:35.150]That was gonna be my opener. [19:38.020]Have you guys seen those new hand dryers in the bathroom? [19:42.090]-I thought that was just a rumor. -True story. - [19:49.030]Look,I gotta tell you something. [19:51.500]I'm not 1 7. I said that so you'd think I was vulnerable. [19:55.540]I'm actually 30. I have a wife and a job. I'm your congressman. [20:01.310]This is ridiculous. We're great together. [20:04.210]We can talk,make each other laugh,and the ***.... [20:08.350]I have no frame of reference, but I thought that was great. [20:12.460]-lt was. -Then what's the problem? - [20:21.060]It's icky. [20:23.330]"lcky"? “lcky”? [20:24.870]You're actually gonna throw this away because it's "icky"? [20:29.640]This isn't easy for me either. I wish things were different. [20:36.780]...or we lived in biblical times... [20:40.450]-... I could really -No,don't say it. - [20:43.220]Love you. [20:48.860]-Are your hands still wet? -Moist. - [20:51.460]Let's dry them again. [20:59.240]Or,like,"Could these margaritas be any stronger?" [21:04.880]Hey,Chandler. [21:06.310]Hello,Mr. Bing. [21:07.880]Loved your Stevie Wonder last night. [21:12.080]Thanks. About the weekly numbers,I'm gonna need them on my desk by 9:00. [21:17.420]-Sure. -No problem. [21:22.360]You have to give them something. [21:24.660]That was Gerston,Santos,and who's the other guy? [21:28.130]-Petrie. -Petrie. Right,okay. [21:30.270]Well,some people are gonna be working... [21:33.100]...this weekend. … [22:04.640]Oh,that's nice. [22:12.040]Ross. [22:23.650]I'm here. [22:27.220]You are? [22:34.030]We were just.... [22:37.670]What? [22:41.910]-Great. Now I'm having a baby. -What? - [22:46.580]I'm having a baby. I'm having a [22:50.010]-The phone,the phone. -I don't have the phone. [22:57.120]I'm hurt. [23:02.890]Let's go. Come on,people. Woman in labor. [23:06.230]-Look what I got going. -Save it for the cab. - [23:10.400]We're going to a hospital. [23:12.940]I can't look nice? There are doctors there. [23:16.370]-Joey,get out of the fridge. -All right. - [23:20.280]-What is that? -For the ride. - [23:22.450]-Like in a cab -Save it. - [23:24.350]-Hating this. -Monica,come on. Let's go. - [23:27.650]Baby coming. [23:28.850]I can't believe I'm gonna be an aunt. [23:31.620]-I'll have a nephew. -That's nice. Get out. - [23:38.560]All right,I'm going. I'm going. [23:48.040]Here we go. Come on.